So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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