She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
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Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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