I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Randomize
