just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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