Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
