I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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