hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
So vagazzling was a success
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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