I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
