Are we in a gay sports bar?
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
