Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
