This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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