Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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