It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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