Your tits are I can't wait for
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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