we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
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