I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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