Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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