Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
