I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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