This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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