No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize