just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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