It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize