Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Terrible idea I love it
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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