The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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