Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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