I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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