we have officially mastered the walk of shame
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Randomize
