Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
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