u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
