my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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