"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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