I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Randomize
