I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Randomize
