yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
this will be a night to untag.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
