Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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