We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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