tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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