I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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