...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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