i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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