jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
He is an equal opportunity slut.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
