This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
