How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
