If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
