I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
organizing the empties. That sober.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
