i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
