What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
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