woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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