party gras won. party gras always wins.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
