So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
